Happy Saturday (ahem, not Thursday) Everyone!
I found myself reflecting on 2016 U.S. politics this week. If you’re not down to revisit all of that skip to Section 2.
Kisses on all of your forehead for opening, reading, and commenting on this newsletter. I’m finding this a delightful and unexpected way to stay connected.
Rachel
1.Walking (sad)
For most of my adult life I have started the day by walking. With each step my thoughts seem to unravel and dissipate into the sky above me. After 3 miles I am lighter and full of wonder. I’m ready to meet—maybe even dance with—the day.
Yet some of my anxieties from my walks in 2016 still cut through to today. I remember walking down Bergan Street towards the brownstones and feeling unsteady, part of a collective vertigo.
A presidential candidate—who would later shock everyone in the neighborhood by winning the presidency—was making a public spectacle out of calling his opponents names. After his fits of derision, he would often spit out a single word to sum everything up: Sad!
I remember trailing the wrought iron fences with their sharp finials evenly spaced at 6-inches apart and reflecting on the quiet violence of distorting this tender and brave word. Sad. Instead of holding forth the courage-of-feeling required to let go and move with the currents of impermanence, sad had been reduced to a taunt.
We mostly dismissed this as comical because it is straight from the playbook of 7-year-olds. It is on the playground where we begin to pretend we are not hurt or sad or angry or vulnerable. We feign being unaffected and tell the playful lie: sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.
Words have hurt us all.
The childishness of name calling belies the danger of dehumanizing others. Likening our emotional lives to a pitiful weakness—sad—shames all of humanity as a pitiful weakness, and belies the self-loathing required to do so.
Anyway, yadda, yadda, yadda. We’ve known all this for centuries.
My diagram for how everything perpetuates.
2.Graduating (sadness)
This week on my morning walks I’ve passed balloon stands outside of schools, and houses decorated with graduation banners. I’ve watched parents, who have likely taken time off work, walk proudly beside their kids dressed up in graduation gowns.
Yet at every celebration there is also sadness. The quiet part of you that longs for your child to be small again even though you could not have felt more proud (or relieved) to see them graduate middle school this week.
Snapshots from this week’s morning walks.
Sadness is the favorite cousin of all the other emotions. She opens the door to new joys. Stands shoulder to shoulder with pride. She waits patiently below anger. And is with you on the narrow path to awe.
Sadness is the salt dissolved in acceptance (and the way out of being a controlling, fixated, desperate a-hole).
She offers a foot hold to courage. Once you know you can feel her you know you can feel anything.
Sadness is the doula for wisdom and compassion and likely the forgotten seeds of your most merciful contributions.
Sadness quietly burns away the sticky residue of regret and devastation. She lovingly tends to all that is no longer yours, so you can let go and be whole again.
3.Q3 Power Mapping
Summer Group Mapping is now open to enrollments! I’d LOVE to have you join us.
We will practice the art of owning our own greatness and taking actions (big and small) to create the life we were born for. Hint: it’s nothing short of magnificent!
The program runs for a full quarter and is my unique combination of fun and intense—A Fun Intensive! As it it is summer we will be leaning more towards FUN!
Here are the details:
3 months
9 people (5 spots available)
6 x Power Map sessions - 90 min (Value: $530)
1:1 Map Session - 60 min (Value: $240)
1:1 Check-in session - 30 min (Value: $120)
Weekly Accountability Emails (Value: $120+)
Price: $490 (for over $1,000 of value)